give Him what is right, not what is left

jadefaith @ 2009-10-26T00:20:00

2009-10-25T16:22:31Z

changing to wordpress. =)
http://jadefaith.wordpress.com

Everything To Me

2009-10-15T07:27:27Z

Everything To Me - Avalon

I grew up in sunday school
I memorized the Golden rule
And how Jesus came to set the sinner free
I know the story inside out
I can tell you all about
The path that led Him up to Calvary
But ask me why He loves me
And I don't know what to say
But i'll never be the same
Because he changed my life when He became...

Everything to me
He's more than a story
more than words on a page of history
He's the air that I breath
The water I thirst for
And the ground beneath my feet
He's everything, everything to me

We're living in uncertain times
And more and more I find that i'm aware
Of just how fragile life can be
I want to tell the world I found
A love that turned my life around
They need to know that they can taste and see
Now everyday I'm praying
Just to give my heart away
I want live for Jesus
So that someone else might see that he is...

Everything to me
He's more than a story
more than words on a page of history
He's the air that I breath
The water I thirst for
And the ground beneath my feet
He's everything
And looking back over my life at the end
I'll go to meet you saying you've been...

You're everything to me
You're more than a story
More than words on a page of history
You're everything to me
You're more than a story
More than words on a page of history
You're the air that I breath
The water I thirst for
And the ground beneath my feet
You're everything to me
Lord, you're everything to me

wow i love this new song a whole lot.
as i was reading the Bible, i listened to this song. and somehow God reminded me of how much He loves me, through the verses, through the promises which said He would provide for us, He would make our paths smooth, He would guide us.
usually when i read it, it would be a reminder and won't really feel much, but this time it impacted me in a way i couldn't explain.
the song ended "you're everything to me", and at that point of time, i totally agreed with it.
God's my everything. i used to think i've got God, and i also have friends, family..... and all that.
but now i agree that God is all i need. not saying i'll forsake friends and family, i still love them. just that if anything happens, God will be there, God can and will help.
He has always been there, just that i didn't notice. i've forsaken Him many times, i'm sorry.
now i know, God, You're my everything

jadefaith @ 2009-10-06T15:26:00

2009-10-06T07:30:25Z

Dear Father.
thank you for speaking to me again. i know you've been reminding me again and again what i needed to do, and i've been compromising. i'm sorry. i'll choose to trust you and surrender everything into your hands. i don't know what will happen but i know you know best. no more doubts, no more distractions, i'm gonna focus. getting back on the right track, i know what i need to do now.

jadefaith @ 2009-10-05T22:28:00

2009-10-05T14:40:19Z

TOTAL REDRAW was indeed eventful! the whole hopekids childrens' day event was great and fun and memorable.
besides that, its also the first time the hopekids choir performs on stage. God really pulled us through, not just pulled but lifted us over.
wow the experience is indescribable. its their first time singing on stage. its also my first time conducting. its really... wow no words can describe.
to think one week ago everything was going wrong. we were so disorganised. during rehearsal i had no clue what i was doing, and nothing was taken seriously. but on the day itself, everything went smoothly, everything went wonderfully. its really great.
all 7 of them sang angelically, full of grace, full of sincerity, it was totally awesome! and they enjoyed it.
they realy sang with all their heart.
i specially love the part where they sang the bridge for Amazed and did the echo. i literally melted right at that moment.
it was so nice.

praise God praise God we did an awesome job!!
thank God for yuhan, beverly, ethan, hanna, kate, sarah and amanda for all their efforts.
had quite a few positive comments from various people. God deserves all the credits!
yay thank you God!

keep moving forward

2009-10-01T03:55:23Z

as i was doing my morning quiet time yesterday, i came across this verse in Isaiah 43:

¹⁸ "Forget the former things;
       do not dwell on the past.

i think this is the first of its kind. God spoke to me through this short verse.
it reminded me not to dwell in my past. i think as human beings its our nature to always think back, it may not be just sad and negative pasts, but we tend to look back at the happy, positive moments as well. humans are thinkers, we think alot, that includes me.
sometimes during the day when i have nothing to do, when i'm taking public transport to one place or another, or even when i'm lying on my bed getting ready to sleep, i tend to look back. i think alot about what people said, major events of my life, what i said to people, and also looked back in the good o' days. and i think about them almost every day and night.
not saying that its bad to look back in the past, but i think its not good to dwell in the past.
that's something that i believe i've been doing.
dwelling in the past is not good. if we dwell in the negative past, like past mistakes and problems, we tend to get discouraged. and if we dwell in the positive past, like our successes, our victories, we may tend to get prideful.
it's good to look back, not just over and over again because it will hinder how our present and future will be.
"forget the former things", forget the past mistakes, past successes [doesn't mean you succeed that time means you will the same], past sins, and keep moving forward.

²⁵ "I, even I, am he who blots out
       your transgressions, for my own sake,
       and remembers your sins no more.

even God doesn't remember our sins, so why should we?
whenever we sin, repent, change and move on, don't dwell in our sins and be condemned.
God can condemn us, but He chose not to, so why should we sentence ourselves to a more severe punishment by condemning ourselves.
forgive and keep moving forward. :D

The Connection

2009-09-17T05:22:42Z

just finish doing my daily morning worship and qt.
i was meditating on 2 songs, one is How Can I Keep From Singing and the other is The Power of Your Name.
the first song really reminded me of the times where God was always there. without fail, He was always by side.
i remember the time where i started singing Give Thanks on the way home after i screwed up my engfund end sem paper.
i recall times where i just started singing to God in my room, crying out to Him where my world was crumbling down. i remember how He never fails to be there, to comfort me whenever i cried out to Him, to assure me when i was worried, to motivate me when i was discouraged. He's always there.

The Power of Your Name
Surely children weren't made for the streets
And fathers were not made to leave
Surely this isn't how it should be
Let Your Kingdom come

Surely nations were not made for war
Or the broken meant to be ignored
Surely this just can't be what You saw
Let Your Kingdom come
Here in my heart

I will live
To carry Your compassion
To love a world that's broken
To be Your hands and feet
I will give
With the life that I've been given
And go beyond religion
[ Lincoln Brewster Lyrics are found on www.songlyrics.com ]
To see the world be changed
By the power of Your name

Surely life wasn't made to regret
And the lost were not made to forget
Surely faith without action is dead
Let Your Kingdom come
Lord break this heart

Your name
Is a shelter for the hurting
Jesus Your name
Is a refuge for the weak
Only Your name
Can redeem the undeserving
Jesus Your name
Holds everything I need

wow this song really convicted me once again. the world needs God, and i want to be the connection - to pull God and man together, to reunite Father and Child. i want to be the one. use me.
looking back the past few months, i've wasted them away. i was distracted. i lost focus, i lost motivation. now i'm back, thank God. i'm back, and i'm not going back the same route i went. no more distractions, i know where i need to head. no more distractions. no regrets

PolyDINS Leadership Camp

2009-09-14T03:00:45Z

wow this camp is so unexpected.
before camp i wasn't really looking forward to it, not saying that i don't want to go, just that it doesn't feel like its camp. but wow i was taken aback. it was so fun, so fruitful, unlike any other camp i've been to.
this camp allowed me to learn alot definitely, to interact with people and even leaders from different campuses to share about our lives, to have hands on activities instead of just teachings, to dream dreams, to get back with God, and to bond with my group.

i really love the activities. this camp has 7 activities and only 2 teachings in total. i love the Walk of Faith. it was a 3 hour night walk. the instruction was to only take instructions from the chief commander, we weren't suppose to listen to anyone else, even our group leaders. we were allowed to buy food, buy whatever, go anywhere, but only with the chief commander's permission. at first i thought this walk would have obstacles or what, but there wasn't, we just walk around the neighbourhood for 3 hours talking to one another. until my group leader, nel, shouted "who wanna buy ice cream?", my entire group went like "me me me" excited and tagged behind her, away from the group, towards
esso station, into cheers to buy ice cream. after eating our delicious ice cream, some of us realise it was a trap. i mean, we weren't suppose to listen to our leaders, only the commander's. oh no. when we reach our destination, all of us just sat on the floor to wait. then nel came along and asked "who say you all can sit down?" we sat down because other people sat down, the commander didn't say we could.

i learn alot from this activity, that we should only obey God's instructions. if our leaders do something that isn't right, we shouldn't blindly follow, which some of us did when nel asked us to buy ice cream. also its easy to fall into temptations around us even without knowing, we fell into nel's trap without even knowing it was a trap. and to persevere throughout the walk. its tiring. 3 hours just walking without knowing where we're heading, its tough, but we've got to persevere.

another activity i love is Dream for the Stars. we went to henderson waveform to dream. it wasn't at night though. it was a peaceful time where we all dream big for our personal goals and campus goals. the experience is really indescribable.
i know my dream - to lead a huge, grand choir to perform all over the world, that people will come to listen to us. our songs and singing will touch them, and after the performance, there will be altar call for people to come to accept Christ into their lives. i can see it. its magnificent!
and also to be an evangelist for God. i can't stand people leading meaningless lives, they need God, and i want to be the one that brings them to Him.
but for now, i want to lead people. by end 2009 i want to be a CL for God, leading 10 people. yeah i wanna make it happen!

there are many other activities, but i can't share all 7 here, come to me and i'll tell you. but this 2 are my highlight activities.
this entire camp i got to talk to different ULs personally. it was really cool. i talked to nel, jen, ace, ritchie and pastor jasmine. i got to ask them about their lives, their past struggles, their turning points, and also questions in leading people better and how to have a more fruitful walk with God. its really very fruitful because i learn alot from these leaders. it was something i never got to do. i also interacted with people from different campuses, like people from ns, di, nyp, rp, sp, np. wow i love this camp alot.

this camp is really indescribable. the only sad thing was it ended too early. i wanted more, it wasn't enough. i love it. i love getting back with God, being reunited again with my Father in heaven. my problems and struggles were somewhat settled. now i'm back to the real world, its time to put everything i've learnt into action. i'm ready, bring it on!

jadefaith @ 2009-09-09T23:07:00

2009-09-09T15:26:19Z

everybody's gotta grow up.
people say that when you reach a certain age, you'll tend to tone down a little. you'll become less high, less talkative, play less as well.
its a phase of life. going through it is not easy.
God i need you in this, its so hard. too hard if i do it without you.

jadefaith @ 2009-08-25T09:21:00

2009-08-25T01:38:11Z

WHOOO WHOOOO EXAMS ARE OVER AND HOLIDAYS ARE HERE!!!
YAY YAY YAY YAY YAY!
wahh its been a long 4 days. though its only 2 papers, but it really drained my energy from all that mugging. but God really helped me all the way during the papers, its like He's standing right next to me guiding me. before the paper itself i was clueless about both subjects, but after being taught by my classmates, i could do them. and most of the things they taught me came out in the paper. its really great!

specially want to thank those in TP IMT S902 who taught me patiently and helped me with my mugging.
namely, debbie, yanting, angela. jessica, danial, charles, and leo. you guys have been a great help. i know i'm not the easiest student, like when you all have to teach me from basics. but sincerely thank you for all your help. without it i wouldn't have been able to even do the paper let alone pass it. yeah thank you!!!

also want to thank my beloved unit TP ENGIT GIRLS! for all you encouragements and prayer smses you all sent me before my papers, they really mean alot to me and you all are greatly appreciated by me! thanks denise, lestari and fiona leow for helping me in my multiplexer also, on the bus, haha! and also huijuan rayna for the nice exam kit, haven't finish eating yet. haha thanks alot you girls! with all of you i know i'll never be going through anything alone.

and last but not least, want to thank misha paule tan. thanks for encouraging me and cheering me on when i'm mugging, for all your care and concern, for constantly praying for me and telling me to jiayou. also for sending me prayer smses every 15 minutes during my paper. seriously i'm touched by that, i mean like... wahh, when i took my phone out after my paper, i was surprised to see so many prayer smses which you sent me every 15 mins. so nice. thanks alot, really. couldn't have done it without you.

wow, now i know how blessed i am with such great people in my life, and also to have a great God who placed this great people in my life. i love my life, seriously! i love God i love all of you! yay!

Give Thanks

2009-08-21T04:14:57Z

wow i think God is seriously awesome!
cause today is the start of my end semester papers, they're like end of year exams for secondary school, so its super major.
its only a few days ago that i started mugging for them due to all the drawing assignments i had to rush and complete.
i had engine fundamentals paper today, and even till this morning right before the exams, there were still alot of topics i didn't understand.
quite stress cause i don't know alot. as i was trying to squeeze as much as i can into my brain, the God reminded me of the show Facing The Giants, the part where the coach said "if we win, we praise Him, if we lose, we praise Him". wow that really boost my confidence and destressed me. i know that all i had to do was give my best and the rest is in God's hands. whatever the results i should just give thanks.

surprisingly, the paper was rather okay, not as hard as i expected. most of the things my friends taught me yesterday and this morning came out in the paper. its really God, He rocks. i did the paper confidently.

however after the paper, my confidence was destroyed when i found out i memorised my codes and codes order wrongly! most of the questions in the paper require the use of these codes, so it means most of my paper is wrong, meaning i might just fail and have to retake the paper. they say the sub paper is harder. wahh that really crushed me. i could say that i was on the verge of crying, but i didn't, just that my mood was very bad.

on the way home on the bus, God reminded me once again to give thanks. immediately the song Give Thanks popped into my mind and i started singing. it goes like:

Give thanks with a grateful heart
Give thanks unto the Holy One
Give thanks because He's given Jesus Christ, His Son

And now let the weak say, 'I am strong'
Let the poor say, 'I am rich
Because of what the Lord has done for us

it really is of great comfort and assurance to me.
really got to thank God. before today i hardly know anything about engine fundamentals, but now i know how to do! God rocks like seriously! whoo!

One Step At A Time

2009-08-13T16:40:19Z

gosh i've been awake for 43 hours with just 2 hours of power nap last night at 4am-6am.
it has been very tiring, and my mind is already occupied with the thought of sleeping that nothing else goes in.

anyway i just did my quiet time. i tried reading Isaiah but nothing went in, i mean i couldn't concentrate on it. i decided to stop reading and prayed instead. as i was praying, i was asking God why i had to sacrifice so much of my sleep for school work. i mean i don't mind sacrificing sleep for ministry or people, but school? then i was reminded that actually i'm doing this for God. this sentence came into my mind:

i'm a christian who happens to be a student. i'm not a student who just so happens to be a christian.

i'm studying, drawing, mugging for God. this is all part of His plan. i'm going through all this, one step at a time, getting closer to where God wants me to be. One step at a time. i don't know my destination, i don't know where i'm going, but as long as i take each step with the person who knows where i'm heading - God, i'll never get lost. yeah trusting in Him always!

God is Faithful

2009-08-12T18:24:27Z

while all of you are sleeping, i'm now chionging drawingESS work. its madness. i won't be able to sleep tonight, but i want to take up awhile to blog. wahh like wrong priorities, okay fast fast.

as i chiong my drawing, the temptation of sleeping and giving up on my work is occupying my mind. God sent dear sarah to my rescue!
really want to thank God so much for her. even as now i'm typing, she's cheering me on when she could be sleeping.
i kept complaining, like "i wanna sleep", "i want to give up", "my bed is tempting me", "my body aching", "i got headache", but she continued cheering and praying for me. i'm so blessed. and she's a really good motivator! ahaha she rocks
and when she prayed for me through msn, this song - You Are So Faithful was playing in my itunes.

Like the sun that rises everyday,
You are so faithful. Lord, You are faithful.
Like the rain that You send,
And every breath that I breathe,
You are so faithful, Lord

Like the rose that comes alive every spring,
You are so faithful. Lord, You are faithful.
Like the life that You give,
to every beat of my heart,
You are so faithful, Lord.

I see the cross and the price You had to pay,
I see the blood that washed my sins away.

In the midst of the storm
through the wind and the waves,
You'll still be faithful, You'll still be faithful,
When the stars refuse to shine and time is no more,
You'll still be faithful,
You'll still be faithful, Lord.

she sent me this prayer, "Dear God, i pray for jade here that u will provide her with strength to be able to complete her sch work that she needed to submit tmr. God may u provide her with energy for her to last until she hand in her work and reach home. God i pray that u will protect her from satan's attacks that she has been facing. Protect and help her, so that she will not fall into his scheming traps that he has
for her. God, may u take away all the suan feeling and headache and anything that is hindering her from doing her sch work. Take all away so that she will be able to complete it. God i uphold her onto ur hands, protect her, help her and bless her. In Jesus name i prayed, AMEN!"

somehow, her prayer touched me as well as the song. i know i'm not drawing alone cause my classmates are all drawing as well. LOL!
and God is always with me, and when i need motivation, God will send people, like sarah, to meet my needs.

yay thanks sarah seraphia ai zai if you're reading this! and thank you God!

jadefaith @ 2009-08-12T12:00:00

2009-08-12T04:02:01Z

i am a sinner because i sin
i sin because i am a sinner

similar sentences, difference meanings.
which is the right one?

INDESCRIBABLE

2009-08-03T16:56:14Z

whoo i went for doctrine class today, its so cool! had revelations! sadly, missed out some parts of the doctrine of God due to drum lessons.
last week was the doctrine of the bible, it was very cool and well-informed. today was the doctrine of God and doctrine of the Holy Spirit.
i think after today, i have a whole new perspective of the Holy Spirit and also in certain areas of my life. its was a time of revelations! simply indescribable!

in the past, or rather even now, i tend to fall into self-condemnation due to the sins i see in myself. sometimes i feel very irritated with myself after committing a sin which i really wanted to get rid off. the habitual sins especially. its like i just repented for that sin awhile ago before i commit it again. i don't think i'm the only one who feels this way. sometimes we wonder how come despite drawing closer to God, it doesn't feel like we're getting less sinful but rather it feels like we're sinning more and more.
today's doctrine class really changed my perspective of this. nel spoke about this issue, when we know God more, it doesn't mean we sin more. as we draw closer to God, the light of God shines more brightly on us and reveals more of our sins to us, that's why we tend to feel we're more and more sinful even as we draw closer to God. when we just come to know God, its as if we're blind to our sins, but as we draw closer to God, He opens our eyes to the sins in us. this motivates us to change. however, we must be careful never to fall into self-condemnation. its very applicable for all of us. when we sin, don't condemn yourself by saying things like "uh.. why am i so sinful?" or "sin sin sin, all i do is sin" haha, but rather repent and move on and work on changing. wow my eyes were really opened. personally i often condemn myself and thought how am i ever gonna rise up if i keep having more sins, but now i know it means God's light is shining brighter on me, yay! and i need to change. yeah man!

i really learnt alot about the Holy Spirit, too much to pen down here. whoo! i really want to be empowered by Him to do God's work!
i really need the help from God especially in the hopekids choir. i can't do it alone, no way is that possible! i need to do it God's way, not my way. i really pray hard!
God, use me use me, i want to fulfill this dream you have for me. things may seems scary, but i don't want to give up. i want to fulfill it! i need your help cause i can't do it alone! thank you in advance! in Jesus name, amen!

personally i want to thank everyone who have been supporting me so far in the hopekids choir. your support really boost my confidence and i'm touched by all your words and help. thanks to those who specially came down to hopekids to support and help me in the choir practices.
namely [not in order of importance whatsoever]:
qianjin
misha
rebecca
crystal
liyin
cher
denise
zhiwei
hong teck
spencer
yushan
kenny
daryl
mag
xiangying
luanchun

lol i can't really remember the rest, i'm sorry if i forget to include you, you're still greatly appreciated!

10 things to say to 10 different people

2009-07-28T15:03:09Z

1. i feel better after talking to you, thanks.
2. i don't know what's gonna happen.
3. its just me.
4. omgosh you're so retarded haha!
5. i'm sorry i didn't really play my part.
6. i'm scared
7. there's so much i want to say but can't.
8. teach me.
9. jiayou girl! don't give up.
10. please don't do something you know you'll regret.

red or white

2009-07-22T17:03:11Z

just got back from caregroup, it was really awesome! i specially like the chairing done by shuh fen.
the first question she asked was "what does this 2 flags represent?"[below]
one said la bi xiao xin, another surrender, and yet another, peace. the reasons were funny but i shouldn't reveal who said what.

victory surrender/defeat

these two flags symbolises two opposites. one represents victory, the other defeat.
shuh fen then posted a question to us: "which flag are we holding in our lives?"
are we holding the red flag or the white one? is our current life situation filled with victory or defeat?
if we're holding on to the white flag, what can we do to get the red one?
immediately after this question was posted, i thought of one area in my life where i'm holding on to the white flag.
things haven't been going well. of course i wouldn't share it out loud here, but i know there's this area in my life that satan have been attacking and definitely i need to overcome it. not alone, because i can't win, but with God.
however, i also managed to think of one victory in my life, and i'm really thankful for it. i need more red flags in my life.

i think all of us need to constantly think and reflect, are we holding on to the red flag.... or the white one?

no longer young, not yet old

2009-07-16T17:25:10Z

just finished doing quiet time and as i was reading my bible, i came across this verse:

Ecclesiastes 11:9-10
Be happy, young man, while you are young,
       and let your heart give you joy in the days of your youth.
       Follow the ways of your heart
       and whatever your eyes see,
       but know that for all these things
       God will bring you to judgment.

¹⁰ So then, banish anxiety from your heart
and cast off the troubles of your body,
for youth and vigor are meaningless.

after reading these 2 verses, i felt old.
as in God somehow reminded me that i was no longer as young as before, nor am i old, so i'm in the middle.
time flies by so fast. it seems like i was only sec 2 yesterday, and today i'm nearing 17 and in poly. i have no more youth day :(
every year seems to be shorter than the previous, now its already mid 2009, soon i'll be 17, then soon 20, then 30 and so on.
the verse was really a reminder for me
it said "be happy.... while you are young" and "in the days of your youth".
i really believe that all of us need to make full use of our youth to do all that we want. be it for God, for others. we need to maximise the time we have as a youth. because once we're old/older, we have more responsibilities and lesser time for all these things. i don't know about you but i don't want to end up being old and i look back wishing i was young again and how much i should have done as a kid. i want to look back and say "i've led the good life, i have no regrets." every moment counts. especially now as we're young, we don't really face financial difficulties, mid-life crisis or health issues, we should do what we really want to do, have fun, fulfill dreams. yeah! this also doesn't mean that we should start acting like a kid, just enjoy life like how a kid would, with no worries.
"banish anxiety form your heart and cast off the troubles of your body." yeap yeap! jiayou! i want to live a life of no regrets!

jadefaith @ 2009-07-16T22:56:00

2009-07-16T15:17:42Z

my mum just bought 2 dvds on Michael Jackson. one of it is a history of his entire fame from beginning till end, the other is a live performance called Dangerous. i watched the first one with cher just now and wow i can see how much influence Michael Jackson has to the entire earth, even to countries like China and Japan. they showed some parts of his various performances and i always see people screaming and even crying while watching him. some even fainted because they were so crazy over him. its really madness.
the program talked about one particular music video that actually cause chaos around the world. it was called Black and White. the song is about different people around the world, then there's a part where Michael danced and did some chaotic actions like trashing the car, breaking glass. after that music video was broadcast, many people around the world imitated his actions. it was all over the news of different countries.
i believe most of us have heard of rumors and negative news about Michael Jackson. personally after hearing them i thought his just some messed up famous guy who got into so much trouble because of fame. but just now as i watched the dvd, i saw another side of him. a side where he loves his family very much, and he's full of compassion for the people, especially the kids of the world, that's why he sang his all famous, Heal The World. its really touching.
though i don't know him well because he's not my generation, but i believe he has made a great impact to the world.
though we aren't famous, maybe for some of us not famous yet, but we can still impact the world one way or another. nothing is too small.
we can be legends in our own special way. yeah

i'm thankful

2009-07-13T14:07:42Z

yesterday i watched a program on discovery channel called Real Wolf Kids.
they featured children who had this disorder known as the werewolf syndrome. they're born with excessive hair all over their face and body. sometimes even too much it blocks their sight, hearing and breathing.
they needed to be constantly shaved and trimmed, however the hair would grow back in a matter of days.
here are some pictures of the kids featured in the show:

this girl is from thailand.

this boy is from india. the 2 pictures are the same person.

the last photo is how bad it could get without trimming.
so far, there are no cure for werewolf syndrome as their chromosomes are normal. even chromosome 8, which determined the hair details, was not mutated as expected. doctors couldn't find the cause.
all they could do now is shave and go for laser treatment. but they are only temporary measures, and laser treatment is a very very painful process and is not adviced to be used on children.
the interesting thing is, the hair on their face is the same kind as those found on the head, not of those of a beard.
this disorder is not hereditary, their siblings and parents are not affected by it.

i really feel alot for these kids. because of the hair, many people judge and stare at them as if they were some aliens. they feel really sad and their self-esteem is greatly affected. all they wish for is that one day they'll find a cure and they would be like everyone else. many have helped them. like doctors who offer to research and find a cure for free, free laser treatments and haircuts.
i really feel very lucky after watching this and another program about a skin disorder called XP. i'm really thankful to be made the way i am. there are so many people less priviledge than i am yet they can live their lives happily. i'll be praying for them. one day a cure for werewolf disorder will be found!

no regrets

2009-07-13T13:50:43Z

its been long since i've blogged, there were many things i wanted to post her, but recently didnt have the time to use the computer. i'll just summarise.
last week's unit caregroup was really great. i specially loved games and sermon d.
played devilman and socks dog and bone for games. it was really fun and violent. ezri ended up with huge bruises. gosh poor thing.
anyway the main thing i wanna share is our sermon d. we watched a video sermon taken from an easter service held in hawaii which was about the unfairness Jesus went through during His time on earth till His crucifixion. many times we complained about how unfair life was. we always complain and make comment like "its not fair!" "why must this happen to ME?" but the unfairness Jesus faced was way worse that those we face. when Jesus was on earth, He was illegally arrested when He did nothing wrong, He was trailed and crucified on the same day within 8 hours[by law, it would take at least a few days after the trail before a person could be executed], false testimonies etc. all these were so unfair, Jesus didn't do anything to deserve any of it. but He didn't complain one bit. go check the bible, you can't find any verse that shows that Jesus complained. you don't see Him saying "why must i be the one that dies? why me?" "i didn't even do anything wrong, so unfair". but He willingly faced all that unfairness for us. He went through all that pain, shame and unfairness for us. though i've listened to many sermons and teachings on Jesus' death, this one was indeed a reminder and wake up call for me. the video ended off with a man who shared His testimony to the audience. this man was a happy man with a wife and 2 beautiful daughters. his life was filled with joy and it was full. however one day, his wife got stabbed to death on the streets. she didn't offend anyone nor did anything to deserve that. she was killed for nothing. her husband, of course, was devastated. the man thought of how unfair it was, his beloved wife was taken away from him. he was at the lowest point of his life, he still had 2 daughters to take care of. then because of God's love, he was reminded of how much Jesus went through even though He didn't deserve it. he knew it was for a reason that happened and he continued his life with his 2 daughters serving God fervently. you all should really watch the video, it was so touching and heart warming, i teared while watching it. this video sermon reminded me of how much i needed to cherish the time and people around me, one day i might lose it all. there are people in my life whom i cherish and love, like my family and friends. i need to start showing and appreciating them. i don't want to regret if one day they were to be gone and didn't get to tell them how important they were in my life. i always don't want to waste anymore time. i know there are times i slacked and just didn't want to do anything. life on earth is short, i don't want to waste it and die regretting. yeah i want to live a life of no regrets!

jadefaith @ 2009-07-07T22:19:00

2009-07-07T14:33:10Z

in the middle of a huge, treacherous, stormy sea was a tower. on top of it perched a dove resting peacefully despite the storm. even as the storm grew stronger, the dove did not fly away. it just laid there, trusting in the tower that it will not fall and let the dove drown.
this was the picture God showed me during worship in Engit Girls Meet.

we should all be like the dove. the tower represents God and the stormy sea represents the struggles we face in our lives. we should trust God that no matter how big the storms may get, He will never let us drown in it. God is strong and when we trust in Him, He will bring us above our difficulties no matter how big it is. the dove also represents peace. when we have faith in God, we can have peace. not just any peace, but inner peace that only He can give.

i really feel that this word came at the right timing. i mean, after what happen yesterday, i really need alot of assurance. i need God badly. i know that i'm entering a time of trails, but if i trust in God that He will not let me down, just like how the dove trusted that the tower will not let it down, i know i can go through it victoriously. 'gulp' i'm scared, honestly. pray pray pray. Father please help me through this, i know after this i'll have a breakthrough! i know it.

jadefaith @ 2009-07-07T14:30:00

2009-07-07T06:46:01Z

once we've overcame an area or struggle in our lives it doesn't mean we will never go through that again. testings and temptations will always come to test us in our faith and endurance in it.
i thought i finally overcame being controlled in my mind by satan, but last night i struggled once again. wahh it was really very scary.
for the past few days my classmates were sharing all kinds ghost stories, i tried not to hear but in the end, i still unintentionally overheard a few from them. due to these stories, i couldn't fall asleep last night till about 4am. i thought i'll never get to sleep, but God was still faithful in His presence that i could get to sleep.
before finally falling asleep, my mind was continuously filled with scary images and thoughts. some are not even linked to the stories i've heard. i got out of bed a few times to turn on the lights and pray, but i was still scared. i even teared awhile. i also tried singing to calm myself down. i sang Voice of Truth, I Know You're There and a few other songs. i guess at that time i wasn't exactly trusting God. i was so afraid. i tried to re read Hebrews 13:5b[amp] because the previous time it helped me alot. however this time i didn't work, i needed a new assurance. at 3am i was prompted to get up and read my Bible. wahh God really assured me through it. i randomly turned to different pages and at every page i turn to, there's definitely a word to encourage me. i saw words like "do not worry" "if the Lord is for us, who can be against us?", "what can man do to me?" "He will strengthen us" "ask and it will be given to you" "never will i leave you, never will i forsake you". it really strengthened my faith.
after reading, i turned off the lights and went back to bed again. as i laid down, i kept my mind on God and amazingly, no scary thoughts came into my mind. it was as if a spiritual forcefield has been created to protect me and i managed to sleep very soundly. yay.
i think all these sounds very dramatic but its true and i really can't thank God enough. i thought i was never going to fall asleep, but He loves me and He never fails!

running

2009-06-28T14:00:07Z

Matthew 20:16
For many are called, but few chosen.

i think this verse means that many are given the opportunity to do something great for God, but only few are willing to take up that opportunity.
there are 3 kinds of people, people who are:
1. not willing to take it up
2. willing, but gives up halfway
3. willing and finishes it well.

we are running this race for God, our goal is to start well finish well.
many are able to start well, but how many of them are able to finish it well as well?
personally, i don't really like the word "race" because it directs my attention to "running". i hate running. i never liked it.
in secondary school, there's this part of our school life we can never miss - 2.4km run.
wahh i seriously hate that to the core. i remember there are times during PE we have to run, but i'll end up walking throughout the whole thing. even when my classmates and teacher press me on to run, i'll just walk. i'll take my own sweet time that most of the time i don't get to finish all 4 rounds. after it all, i just feel neutral like "oh its over, next lesson.." however, i recall times when i really ran all the way. when i finish all 4 rounds, i'll be sweaty, tired, but satisfied no matter how well i did.
i remember i'll be so happy that i'll tell my classmates proudly that "hey, i finish 2.4! i didnt even stop or walk!" i believe all of us wanna end off like this as well. having that sense of satisfaction and accomplishment is always indescribable.
i want to end off my race of God this way too! i want to reach heaven saying "hey, i finish the race! i didnt give up, i fell many times but i didnt give up!" whoo!
in this race, we're never the only ones running. we have our fellow brothers and sisters running with us.

he bible says in Ecclesiastes 5:9-10

⁹ Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their work:

¹⁰ If one falls down,
       his friend can help him up.
       But pity the man who falls
       and has no one to help him up!

we all have people around us who will pick us up when we fall. let's help one another and finish the race! i wanna see you there with me at the finishing line!

jadefaith @ 2009-06-22T21:57:00

2009-06-22T14:08:19Z

whoo God rocks BIG TIME!
today i got back my results for my term test. wasn't expecting much, i was expecting to fail, its engine math and engine fundamentals. engine math is amath in secondary school, which i was never able to do and ended up dropping the subject during mid sec 3. i couldn't even get an f9, that was how bad i was at amath. i'm happy that i passed engine fundamentals! i passed on the dot 50%. thank God i didnt fail. phew!
what's more surprising is my engine math, i got 63%!!! omgosh i was so happy! i not only passed, but i got more than just a pass! wahh seriously! even though i spotted a few careless mistakes here and there, it didn't bother me because i PASSED! WHOO WHOO! its really God its really God! haha! it really boosted my confidence in math, but i still hate math. lol!
really thank God for CHESTER for teaching me math patiently the other day at airport. you really taught me from scratch that day, i didn't even know the basics! thanks alot! if God didn't send you to teach me, i believe i wouldn't even pass. thanks a whole lot!
thanks to DEBBIE and YANTING too! for teaching me and guiding me all the way during lessons. i'm a slow learner, but you both were still patient with me.
thank God for the people who cheered me on and prayed for me. mainly the TP TRANSFERS PEOPLE! yeah we went through exams period together! we really studied hard and prayed hard and played hard! and MISHA! thanks for cheering me on and smsing me like Jiayou and for keeping me in prayers too! whoo!
i'm so HAPPY!!!!!!!!!

meditation & breakthrough

2009-06-19T17:28:35Z

whoo breakthrough!
it may not seem a very big breakthrough but i'm really for it! God really used Battlefield of The Mind to really speak to me and guide me in getting my mind changed. before that, i was constantly bombarded with negative thoughts and getting spiritually attacked, it was pretty jialat.
due to it, i always had sleepless nights because i'll be too afraid to sleep, i often had nightmares and sometimes even waking up in tears. my mind was a huge mess and a vulnerable target for satan.
also, i'm not the kind that reads christian literatures all the time. sometimes i even find them boring. but what motivated me to read was that i needed a breakthrough in this area and i wanted it badly.
after i applied what i've learnt from the book and the Bible, i saw things starting to change.
nowadays i realise i'm able to sleep well and had no more nightmares. i'm even able to come out from underneath my blanket when i sleep at night, which was how i always sleep in the past. even when i sweat, i wouldnt dare to come out from under my blanket. its been like this for years. and whenever negativity or thoughts from satan came into my mind, God helps me to bind them down in His mighty name!
i know its not fully settled because it can always happen again. mustn't let my guard down!

one thing that really helped me was meditation. meditating on God helped me alot! it helped me feel secure and protected.
at night, sometimes before i'll sleep, i'll meditate on Hebrew 13:5b[amp v.] i'll feel really assured after that. i shall emphasise that the Word of God is a very very very VERY powerful weapon to use against satan and his demons. really! i'm not kidding! all of us need to be rooted in it. i can't tell you how much meditating on God's Word and using His Word as a weapon has helped me in my walk with God. try it out for yourself. you'll be amazed what you can accomplish with it and with God.